He Opened My Closed Heart

By Hazel Holland

"I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were refusing to help Me." Matthew 25:45

The other day on my way to work, I stopped by the gas station to fill up because I noticed that my car was running on low.  As I opened the door, I was not only very focused on the tutoring lessons I was going to teach that afternoon, but I was also feeling very relieved that today I had given myself enough time so that I wouldn't have to rush to get to my first student on time.

Before I could get fully out of the car, I was startled by a stranger who approached me from behind.  She apologetically asked me if I could please help her with gas for her SUV that was parked at the pump right behind me.

"I'm sorry!  I didn't mean to make you jump," she offered.  I'm not homeless!" she continued.  "I can pay you back if you give me your cell phone number.  It's just that I need to get my aunt to the hospital in Fontana for some important tests and my credit card is being rejected..."

There she was, right up in my face, and I was supposed to decide if she was legitimate or not, right?  I noticed the children in the back seat of her SUV, and her aunt watching me from the passenger seat with her left arm wrapped in a bandage.

As I moved toward the gas pump beside her van, I silently prayed for wisdom as to know how to respond to this stranger's need.  "How much gas should I put in, Lord?"

Just as I was about to use my debit card, I changed my mind and handed her a five dollar bill instead.  "Hope this helps!" I offered weakly.  She thanked me warmly, then walked into the gas station to pay the attendant, and I proceeded to use my card to fill up my tank.

Although my back was towards her I could hear the gas going into her car.  It didn't take very long.  Five dollars doesn't go very far these days.

Suddenly, the Holy Spirit confronted me with my closed heart!  In an instant I knew that I was turning my back on Him.  Yes, I had given this stranger a poultry five dollars for gas so as to appease my conscience, but had I really listened to her heart... and even more importantly had I really listened to God's heart... for her?  Or had my fear of possibly being taken advantage of caused me to "wash my hands" of further responsibility?

Immediately I came to my senses when I heard her gas pump click.  I knew she was done...but my five dollars would never get her aunt to the hospital in Fontana!  Abruptly I stopped filling up my tank as the price reached $20.

"God, how much more money should I give her?" I pleaded.  At once I sensed a witness in my spirit and knew I was to offer her another ten.  So I reached into my car for the money, and turned to face her just as she was about to get back in her SUV.

"No, wait!  Here's another ten dollars" I offered.  "I'm so sorry for having closed my heart towards you just now!  Please, forgive me!" I sobbed.  "Although I'm a Christian, my heart was not open towards you because I was preoccupied with getting to work on time..." 

Now I was the one who was taking her by surprise.  "No!  No!  That's alright!  Are you sure you want to do this?  I can pay you back if you give me your cell phone number."  She smiled and hugged me tightly as the tears rolled down my face.

"No, you don't need to pay me back.  This is my gift to you.  Now you're be able to make it to the hospital," I stammered.

"Yes!  Yes!  Thank you so very much!" she warmly responded.  Then she turned around and walked back into the gas station to pay the attendant...again.

Before I got back into my car, the aunt who had been watching this whole scenario from inside the SUV mouthed, "Thank you!" and "God bless you for what you did...!"

As I got back into my car, it really didn't matter that my gas tank was only half full, because God's Spirit had filled up my love tank to overflowing!  Although my heart had been momentarily closed to the needs of a stranger, God's Spirit had healed my fear and set my heart free!

See original link to this painting: Lover and His Beloved